I have a dog that burps. There's nothing inherently unique about this fact, unless you consider that she pretty much intentionally does it in my face. Lots of people (usually dog trainers and the like) say that dogs aren't motivated by anything other than instinct when they act. I disagree.
My dog burps in my face because she can and because she thinks it's funny. Sometimes she also farts while staring at me.
At first, I thought maybe I was being a little sensitive. See, my dog (until very recently) has never really liked me all that much. She's a daddy's girl and can regularly be found curling up lovingly at my husband's feet, shoving her face into his armpit and falling asleep, sticking her nose in his ear and trying to wake him up. You know, that kind of cute, doggy-type thing. On the other hand, she can typically be found growling at me if I get too close to her for any reason (although her growls have really turned into a sort of high-pitched whining because she knows she'll get in trouble for actually growling). Unless food or toys are involved, she generally wants very little to do with me - except that recently, she has decided that I am her perfect playmate and she assaults me at all times of the day with her strange red Martha Stewart rope toy. But I digress...
The long and short of it is that I have a very gassy dog who enjoys making public displays of her gassy-ness, generally in the direction of my face. Like when, approximately ten minutes ago, she stood in the middle of the living room floor (I'm home sick again today), stared at me (all the while wagging her tail), and burped very loudly and very intentionally. I'm pretty sure I heard her chuckle after that.
And sometimes when I refuse to respond to her cries for attention, she deliberately turns her back on me and farts. Tell me that's not intentional.
My dog hates me. Still, she's pretty amazing at performing feats of gas that are difficult even for my dad.
t.
